“If a man wants a better match, the father shall betroth his daughter himself if she is a maiden, and the brother shall do it if the father is dead. If the father will not give his daughter to the man to whom she has been betrothed, he shall be summoned home and a day be fixed on which he shall have his betrothed. If the betrother will not let him have her, he shall demand the dowry of his betrothed, and summon him to the Thing for robbery; then the thingmen have to outlaw him. The maiden has no power in this matter, if she does not draw back from the marriage herself. The man who has charge of the betrothed woman may keep her from the betrothed man for a twelvemonth. A widow may betroth herself, but shall take the advice of her kinsmen; then she cannot break her troth. If she has not taken the advice of her kinsmen, she may break it and pay three marks for the breach of faith to the one who was betrothed to her. If a man betroths to a man a woman over whom he has no betrothing power, he shall pay three marks to the one who was betrothed to her. Two or more brothers shall have power over their sister; if one of them betroths her to a man, and the others object, then they shall draw lots who of them shall rule; if the one who betrothed her draws the lot, the betrothal shall be kept, otherwise not, and then the betrother shall pay three marks for breach of faith” (Earlier Gulathing’s Law, c. 51).

The length of the betrothal, if no special agreement had been made, was limited to twelve months, that being the longest time that a woman’s guardian could defer a marriage against the will of her future husband. Three years seems to have been the longest delay allowed; during that time the woman was said to sit as betrothed, if the suitor was away and did not return within that time the agreement was void, and the woman was free to marry another man.

“Björn now rode to Borg to see his kinsman Skúli. When they met, Björn told him that he wished above all to get Oddny Thorkel’s daughter before he left. Skúli asked if he had said anything about it to her. Björn answered he had certainly done so. Then let us go, said Skúli; and they went. They came to Hjörsey, and saw Thorkel and his daughter Oddny. Björn then told him the state of his feelings, and asked Oddny in marriage. Thorkel took it well, and referred it altogether to his daughter’s decision. As Björn had been known to her before, and they had loved each other very fondly, she consented. Then the betrothal was performed at once, and she was to sit betrothed for three winters. And even if Björn, while staying in the same country (Iceland), was prevented from marrying her, she was to wait for him nevertheless during a fourth winter. If he should not come back from Norway in three winters, Thorkel was to give her in marriage if he liked. Also Björn was to send men to Iceland to renew the betrothal if he could not come himself. Skúli contributed as part of the contract so much property with Björn that it was as much as all the property which Thorkel added to his daughter’s mund”[12] (Björn Hitdælakappi’s Saga).

The betrothed who without valid reason did not fulfil her engagement, and the giver-away who kept back the betrothed woman, were outlawed. If she of her free will took another man than her betrothed, both she and the giver-away were outlawed.

“If a man betroths a woman he shall have her married within twelve months if no necessity hinders” (Frostath., iii. 12).

“The giver-away of a woman may keep her from her betrothed man for twelve months” (Gulathing’s Law, 51).

“If she (the betrothed woman) wants to break the betrothal within twelve months, and says she has been betrothed against her will, he can use his witnesses against her words and get her. If he lacks witnesses then she and also her father and mother, or their nearest kinsmen if they do not exist, shall assure it is against her will with an oath, and pay the betrothed man as much as was promised. If this takes place after the wedding she loses her third” (Frostath., iii. 22).

“If the man to whom a woman is betrothed becomes sick he shall send word half a month before (the wedding) to the man who has betrothed the woman that he will not come to the wedding on account of his health, and the woman need not be brought home to him though it was agreed, and the reasons must be told. Then the wedding shall not be before the same time next year, unless the man wants it before, and then word must be sent half a month or more before, and he shall keep the wedding at his sole cost. If he does not recover in the next twelvemonth the betrothal is dissolved, unless both wish otherwise” (Gragas, i. 310).

The wedding generally took place at the home of the bride; very seldom at the bridegroom’s: on the wedding-night the mund became the wife’s personal property.

After the marriage the bride and bridegroom were hjón, a word which means man and wife; and then the wife became an eiginkona (own woman, wife, spouse) and hùsfreyja (housewife), and enjoyed the rights belonging to that position.

“Illugi lived at Hólm in Akranes. He was tall and strong and wealthy; he went on a wooing-journey to Ölfusvatn, and asked for Thurid, the daughter of Grimkel by his first wife. Grimkel answered favourably, for he knew Illugi; the betrothal was performed there; Hörd (Grimkel’s son by Signy) was not present at this. In the tvimanad (September) the wedding-feast was to be at Ölfusvatn, and when the appointed day came Illugi made ready to go with thirty men” (Hörd’s Saga, ch. ii.).

No rings were exchanged or given either at the betrothal or the wedding. That the bride had a special dress for the bridal ceremony seems to be certain, though in no Saga have we a description of a bridal dress; but from several passages we see that the bride was hvit-földud (white-folded), and lin-bundin (linen-bound, enveloped in linen), which implies that the bridal dress was white.

“It is told that the first evening of the wedding the brides (King Svein’s, and that of Sigvaldi, Jarl of the Jomsvikings) had their head-dress (fald) low down so that their faces could not be distinctly seen; next morning they were very merry and did not wear any skuplas.”[13]

This bridal linen was a long wide head-dress hanging down the back from the top of the head, or a kind of veil. In Thrymskvida the bride wore such a head-dress, which was fastened on the head with an ornament. At the waist a bunch of keys was placed to show her authority as mistress of the household, and on her breast she had an ornament.

The jötun Thrym had got Thor’s hammer and would not give it back, unless Freyja were married to him. Thor was disguised as Freyja, and sent as a bride to Thrym; he got hold of the hammer, and crushed Thrym and the jötnar.

Then said Thor, The mighty Ás, The Asar will me Effeminate call If I let myself Be tied in bridal linen.

Then they tied Thor In the bridal linen, And the great Brisinga-necklace;[14] Let keys hang From his belt, And woman’s clothes Hang round his knees, And broad stones[15] Be on his breast, And fastened the cloth[16] On his head with skill.

(Thrymskvida.)

We have nothing to show positively that marriage was celebrated with religious ceremonies, but certain forms may have taken place. In the later Edda we have the goddess Vár, who hears the vows of men and women. In Helgi Hjörvardson there are also vows called by her name, and it seems that she was solemnly invoked at weddings, and the sign of the hammer of Thor made over the bride.

Then said Thrym, The chief of Thursar: Carry in the hammer To consecrate the bride, Lay Mjöllnir In the maiden’s lap. Wed us together With the hand of Var.

The mind laughed In the breast of Hlórridi[17] As the hard-minded one Saw the hammer; Thrym killed he first, The lord of Thursar, And thrashed The Jötun’s whole kin.

(Earlier Edda; Thrymskvida.)[18]

Marriage without betrothal proceedings and dowry was called skyndibrúdhlaup (hasty wedding), or lausa-brudhlaup (loose wedding). Such an union was illegal, and the children begotten thereby had no right of inheritance.

“Björgólf, a landed man in Halogaland, once in his old age was at a feast with Högni, a rich bondi, and saw his daughter Hildirid, whom he liked well.

“The same autumn Björgólf the old left on his skuta with thirty men. He came to Leka (Högni’s farm), and twenty men went up to the farm, while ten guarded the ship. When they came home Högni received him well, and invited him to stay there with his men; he accepted, and went into the stofa (daily room). When they had taken off their outer clothes Högni had a skap-ker (large vessel) with ale carried in. Hildirid, his daughter, carried ale to the guests. Björgólf called Högni, and said: ‘My errand hither is that I wish thy daughter to go home with me, and I will marry her in loose wedding.’ Högni saw he could do nothing but what Björgólf wished. Björgólf bought her with an eyrir of gold.... They had two sons, Hárek and Hrœrek, and Björgólf died afterwards. Then Brynjólf, his son by the first wife, sent her away to her father. They were called Hildirid-sons, and not by the name of the father. Brynjólf died, and his son Bard got his death wounds in the battle of Hafrsfjord. Bard had the king called to him, and said: ‘If I die from these wounds I ask you to allow me to dispose of my inheritance.’ The king consented. Bard said: ‘I wish my companion and kinsman Thorólf to take all my inheritance, lands and loose property; I will also give him my wife and my son to bring up, for I trust him best of all men.’ Thorólf according to the wish of his friend married this wife, Sigrid, daughter of Sigurd in Sandnes” (Egil’s Saga, 7).