DUET—CASILDA and LUIZ.

LUIZ. There was a time— A time for ever gone—ah, woe is me! It was no crime To love but thee alone—ah, woe is me! One heart, one life, one soul, One aim, one goal— Each in the other's thrall, Each all in all, ah, woe is me!

BOTH. Oh, bury, bury—let the grave close o'er The days that were—that never will be more! Oh, bury, bury love that all condemn, And let the whirlwind mourn its requiem!

CAS. Dead as the last year's leaves— As gathered flowers—ah, woe is me! Dead as the garnered sheaves, That love of ours—ah, woe is me! Born but to fade and die When hope was high, Dead and as far away As yesterday!—ah, woe is me!

BOTH. Oh, bury, bury—let the grave close o'er, etc.

(Re-enter from the Ducal Palace the Duke and Duchess, followed by Don Alhambra del Bolero, the Grand Inquisitor.)

DUKE. My child, allow me to present to you His Distinction Don Alhambra del Bolero, the Grand Inquisitor of Spain. It was His Distinction who so thoughtfully abstracted your infant husband and brought him to Venice. DON AL. So this is the little lady who is so unexpectedly called upon to assume the functions of Royalty! And a very nice little lady, too! DUKE. Jimp, isn't she? DON AL. Distinctly jimp. Allow me! (Offers his hand. She turns away scornfully.) Naughty temper! DUKE. You must make some allowance. Her Majesty's head is a little turned by her access of dignity. DON AL. I could have wished that Her Majesty's access of dignity had turned it in this direction. DUCH. Unfortunately, if I am not mistaken, there appears to be some little doubt as to His Majesty's whereabouts. CAS. (aside). A doubt as to his whereabouts? Then we may yet be saved! DON AL. A doubt? Oh dear, no—no doubt at all! He is here, in Venice, plying the modest but picturesque calling of a gondolier. I can give you his address—I see him every day! In the entire annals of our history there is absolutely no circumstance so entirely free from all manner of doubt of any kind whatever! Listen, and I'll tell you all about it.

SONG—DON ALHAMBRA (with DUKE, DUCHESS, CASILDA, and LUIZ).

I stole the Prince, and I brought him here, And left him gaily prattling With a highly respectable gondolier, Who promised the Royal babe to rear, And teach him the trade of a timoneer With his own beloved bratling.

Both of the babes were strong and stout, And, considering all things, clever. Of that there is no manner of doubt— No probable, possible shadow of doubt— No possible doubt whatever.

ALL. No possible doubt whatever.

But owing, I'm much disposed to fear, To his terrible taste for tippling, That highly respectable gondolier Could never declare with a mind sincere Which of the two was his offspring dear, And which the Royal stripling!

Which was which he could never make out Despite his best endeavour. Of that there is no manner of doubt— No probable, possible shadow of doubt— No possible doubt whatever.

ALL. No possible doubt whatever.

Time sped, and when at the end of a year I sought that infant cherished, That highly respectable gondolier Was lying a corpse on his humble bier— I dropped a Grand Inquisitor's tear— That gondolier had perished.

A taste for drink, combined with gout, Had doubled him up for ever. Of that there is no manner of doubt— No probable, possible shadow of doubt— No possible doubt whatever.

ALL. No possible doubt whatever.

The children followed his old career— (This statement can't be parried) Of a highly respectable gondolier: Well, one of the two (who will soon be here)— But which of the two is not quite clear— Is the Royal Prince you married!

Search in and out and round about, And you'll discover never A tale so free from every doubt— All probable, possible shadow of doubt— All possible doubt whatever!

ALL. A tale free from every doubt, etc.

CAS. Then do you mean to say that I am married to one of two gondoliers, but it is impossible to say which? DON AL. Without any doubt of any kind whatever. But be reassured: the nurse to whom your husband was entrusted is the mother of the musical young man who is such a past-master of that delicately modulated instrument (indicating the drum). She can, no doubt, establish the King's identity beyond all question. LUIZ. Heavens, how did he know that? DON AL. My young friend, a Grand Inquisitor is always up to date. (To Cas.) His mother is at present the wife of a highly respectable and old-established brigand, who carries on an extensive practice in the mountains around Cordova. Accompanied by two of my emissaries, he will set off at once for his mother's address. She will return with them, and if she finds any difficulty in making up her mind, the persuasive influence of the torture chamber will jog her memory.

RECITATIVE—CASILDA and DON ALHAMBRA.

CAS. But, bless my heart, consider my position! I am the wife of one, that's very clear; But who can tell, except by intuition, Which is the Prince, and which the Gondolier?

DON AL. Submit to Fate without unseemly wrangle: Such complications frequently occur— Life is one closely complicated tangle: Death is the only true unraveller!

QUINTET—DUKE, DUCHESS, CASILDA, LUIZ, and GRAND INQUISITOR.

ALL. Try we life-long, we can never Straighten out life's tangled skein, Why should we, in vain endeavour, Guess and guess and guess again?

LUIZ. Life's a pudding full of plums,

DUCH. Care's a canker that benumbs.

ALL. Life's a pudding full of plums, Care's a canker that benumbs. Wherefore waste our elocution On impossible solution? Life's a pleasant institution, Let us take it as it comes!

Set aside the dull enigma, We shall guess it all too soon; Failure brings no kind of stigma— Dance we to another tune!

LUIZ. String the lyre and fill the cup,

DUCH. Lest on sorrow we should sup.

ALL. Hop and skip to Fancy's fiddle, Hands across and down the middle— Life's perhaps the only riddle That we shrink from giving up!

(Exeunt all into Ducal Palace except Luiz, who goes off in gondola.)

(Enter Gondoliers and Contadine, followed by Marco, Gianetta, Giuseppe, and Tessa.)

CHORUS.

Bridegroom and bride! Knot that's insoluble, Voices all voluble Hail it with pride. Bridegroom and bride! We in sincerity Wish you prosperity, Bridegroom and bride!

SONG—TESSA.

TESS. When a merry maiden marries, Sorrow goes and pleasure tarries; Every sound becomes a song, All is right, and nothing's wrong! From to-day and ever after Let our tears be tears of laughter. Every sigh that finds a vent Be a sigh of sweet content! When you marry, merry maiden, Then the air with love is laden; Every flower is a rose, Every goose becomes a swan, Every kind of trouble goes Where the last year's snows have gone!

CHORUS. Sunlight takes the place of shade When you marry, merry maid!

TESS. When a merry maiden marries, Sorrow goes and pleasure tarries; Every sound becomes a song, All is right, and nothing's wrong. Gnawing Care and aching Sorrow, Get ye gone until to-morrow; Jealousies in grim array, Ye are things of yesterday! When you marry, merry maiden, Then the air with joy is laden; All the corners of the earth Ring with music sweetly played, Worry is melodious mirth, Grief is joy in masquerade;

CHORUS. Sullen night is laughing day— All the year is merry May!

(At the end of the song, Don Alhambra enters at back. The Gondoliers and Contadine shrink from him, and gradually go off, much alarmed.)

GIU. And now our lives are going to begin in real earnest! What's a bachelor? A mere nothing—he's a chrysalis. He can't be said to live—he exists. MAR. What a delightful institution marriage is! Why have we wasted all this time? Why didn't we marry ten years ago? TESS. Because you couldn't find anybody nice enough. GIA. Because you were waiting for us. MAR. I suppose that was the reason. We were waiting for you without knowing it. (Don Alhambra comes forward.) Hallo! DON AL. Good morning. GIU. If this gentleman is an undertaker it's a bad omen. DON AL. Ceremony of some sort going on? GIU. (aside). He is an undertaker! (Aloud.) No—a little unimportant family gathering. Nothing in your line. DON AL. Somebody's birthday, I suppose? GIA. Yes, mine! TESS. And mine! MAR. And mine! GIU. And mine! DON AL. Curious coincidence! And how old may you all be? TESS. It's a rude question—but about ten minutes. DON AL. Remarkably fine children! But surely you are jesting? TESS. In other words, we were married about ten minutes since. DON AL. Married! You don't mean to say you are married? MAR. Oh yes, we are married. DON AL. What, both of you? ALL. All four of us. DON AL. (aside). Bless my heart, how extremely awkward! GIA. You don't mind, I suppose? TESS. You were not thinking of either of us for yourself, I presume? Oh, Giuseppe, look at him—he was. He's heart-broken! DON AL. No, no, I wasn't! I wasn't! GIU. Now, my man (slapping him on the back), we don't want anything in your line to-day, and if your curiosity's satisfied—you can go! DON AL. You mustn't call me your man. It's a liberty. I don't think you know who I am. GIU. Not we, indeed! We are jolly gondoliers, the sons of Baptisto Palmieri, who led the last revolution. Republicans, heart and soul, we hold all men to be equal. As we abhor oppression, we abhor kings: as we detest vain-glory, we detest rank: as we despise effeminacy, we despise wealth. We are Venetian gondoliers—your equals in everything except our calling, and in that at once your masters and your servants. DON AL. Bless my heart, how unfortunate! One of you may be Baptisto's son, for anything I know to the contrary; but the other is no less a personage than the only son of the late King of Barataria. ALL. What! DON AL. And I trust—I trust it was that one who slapped me on the shoulder and called me his man! GIU. One of us a king! MAR. Not brothers! TESS. The King of Barataria! [Together] GIA. Well, who'd have thought it! MAR. But which is it? DON AL. What does it matter? As you are both Republicans, and hold kings in detestation, of course you'll abdicate at once. Good morning! (Going.) GIA. and TESS. Oh, don't do that! (Marco and Giuseppe stop him.) GIU. Well, as to that, of course there are kings and kings. When I say that I detest kings, I mean I detest bad kings. DON AL. I see. It's a delicate distinction. GIU. Quite so. Now I can conceive a kind of king—an ideal king—the creature of my fancy, you know—who would be absolutely unobjectionable. A king, for instance, who would abolish taxes and make everything cheap, except gondolas— MAR. And give a great many free entertainments to the gondoliers— GIU. And let off fireworks on the Grand Canal, and engage all the gondolas for the occasion— MAR. And scramble money on the Rialto among the gondoliers. GIU. Such a king would be a blessing to his people, and if I were a king, that is the sort of king I would be. MAR. And so would I! DON AL. Come, I'm glad to find your objections are not insuperable. MAR. and GIU. Oh, they're not insuperable. GIA. and TESS. No, they're not insuperable. GIU. Besides, we are open to conviction. GIA. Yes; they are open to conviction. TESS. Oh! they've often been convicted. GIU. Our views may have been hastily formed on insufficient grounds. They may be crude, ill-digested, erroneous. I've a very poor opinion of the politician who is not open to conviction. TESS. (to Gia.). Oh, he's a fine fellow! GIA. Yes, that's the sort of politician for my money! DON AL. Then we'll consider it settled. Now, as the country is in a state of insurrection, it is absolutely necessary that you should assume the reins of Government at once; and, until it is ascertained which of you is to be king, I have arranged that you will reign jointly, so that no question can arise hereafter as to the validity of any of your acts. MAR. As one individual? DON AL. As one individual. GIU. (linking himself with Marco). Like this? DON AL. Something like that. MAR. And we may take our friends with us, and give them places about the Court? DON AL. Undoubtedly. That's always done! MAR. I'm convinced! GIU. So am I! TESS. Then the sooner we're off the better. GIA. We'll just run home and pack up a few things (going)— DON AL. Stop, stop—that won't do at all—ladies are not admitted. ALL. What! DON AL. Not admitted. Not at present. Afterwards, perhaps. We'll see. GIU. Why, you don't mean to say you are going to separate us from our wives! DON AL. (aside). This is very awkward! (Aloud.) Only for a time—a few months. Alter all, what is a few months? TESS. But we've only been married half an hour! (Weeps.)